An anticipated evening of anticipation definitely began on the wrong hoof. From the time we stepped out of our cars, till the time we lounged outside espresso, it was almost as if we were trying too hard to keep up with each other, almost not catching up until the moment was gone. To put blame on one person only would be almost too unkind, though I have been known to be that. In all fairness it was probably the effect of diverse energies coming together. As we are growing older are we becoming more mellowed & accepting or less tolerant? If any individual in our close vicinity is not completely 100% tuned into us-not absolutely in sync with us, not utterly on the same wavelength, without a doubt, no room for ifs and buts-we callously reject them, label them unworthy of our precious time and attention. Don’t get me wrong, I am not passing judgment, I am probably the biggest culprit there is, I am just trying to understand how along the road to mature live-and-let-live we because slightly neurotic be-exactly-as-i-want-or-else people.
In a book, I am reading, by this brilliant marketing analyst Faith Popcorn, she talks about a trend she calls clanning. This she says is a natural human tendency to surround ourselves with similar people, with similar habits, very similar interests-a justification of ourselves, a comfort zone for us to be masters of our destiny in. That is what we do with our friends too. We connect so deeply sometimes, that it’s difficult to tell where our thoughts end, and theirs begin. We constantly feel the need to identify with their deepest desires and know of them even before they do-so that when they realize it, we can pat ourselves on the back and tell them how well we know them. It all has the potential to spiral into an out of control tornado of pretenses, projected reactions, and combined souls. Very scary, very limiting.
Is it time to wipe out the memory bank and start afresh-to get rid of the old stale images we have stored of each individual we know, and rediscover, relive, reaffirm, refresh, realize renew? Is it time to throw out ALL the baggage we have been carrying with us, backs bent double? I think it is. Though before any of you get too pleased about this pep talk, let me also add this-bad tempers, tantrums, being rude to waiters, frowning perpetually, looking for fights to satisfy an ego, behaving like a brat cannot and will not be tolerated however many new starts we take so before we refresh our systems lets grow up.